Child development

 

 I was looking in a drawer and came across a little old A7 spiral-bound notebook ("Compact Note Book B. N. 12. A John Dickinson Product. Made in Great Britain"). The colour cover is a still life of a jar of five roses, four pink and one red. What would be suitable to write in such a book? The first lines answer the question: "William Robert b. 15 September, 1972. weight 7lbs 13 ozs". 

 The book is a journal of 22 pages of brief observations by my mother of the first two and a half years of my life (which is why she chose a pretty, rather than plain notebook to write them in). These run to about 1,450 words. It may be of some general interest as a record of infant development two generations ago. I don't know if much has changed since then in terms of practice or attitudes. I have certainly found it a useful record for myself personally. No-one is left alive who remembers much of me as a baby, so it is curious to be able to observe myself then, a time when I was developing consciousness but before I have specific memories of (they start about the time of the notebook's final entry). The chronology feels right.

 It is also, of course, reassuring to read a personal account of a mother's love for a child when that child was yourself. I came across this journal at the same time that Meta's new generation of smartglasses were launched with the direct pitch to distracted parents, "Never miss a moment". I know that I'd much rather come across a record like this of myself as a baby (observations that she thought worth writing down) than a copious digital file of recordings.  As a character in a Robert Holman play says, "Love is paying attention":

William Robert

 

b. 15 September, 1972

weight 7lbs 13ozs

 

20^th Sept-12 Oct in Special Care Baby Unit with twitches.

 

12^th Oct  Home – weight 9lbs 3ozs, on phenobarbitone medicine

 

*

 At just over 6 weeks W can hold his head up well, smile (just) & make a little cooing noise. He looks at things attentively & can bang on his pram beads.

 

At 3 months W smiles & laughs & babbles very engagingly. He seems very sociable – loves to be talked to and bounced about. He can hold up his head very strongly & just about sit up unassisted for a short time. He eats small quantities of solids and sleeps through the night until 8 or so. I’m still feeding him last thing at night but thinking of downturning this. 

At 4 months

 W now on 4 feeds a day – milk at 7.30-8, milk & cereal at 11, milk & broth at 2, milk & fruit at 6. He then sleeps through the night. He has just learned to turn over from his front to his back but cannot do it without support. Can only sit alone for a very short time. Is more wary of strangers & strange places than he was before but full of smiles for those he knows.

 

Jan 23^rd [1973]

  In hospital – W cut his first tooth! Has settled down well to hosp. routine and smiles at all the nurses.

 

Jan 26^th

  W can now get his thumb to his mouth to suck.

 

Feb 6^th

 W off pheno-barb!

 

 W at 5 months weighs 17lbs 7oz. Is on 3 meals a day most days (though sometimes 4). Likes cereals & fruity things but has turned against savoury tastes.

 

 He is very active and interested in everything. Can pick things up and convey them to his mouth and has discovered his feet – likes to kick them in the air and touch them. Likes to feel the texture of everything. Can’t yet sit without support but likes to be propped up.

 

W at 6 months

 Weighs 18lbs 6oz. Much as at 5 months but can turn over fairly easily now and can also move around the floor by kicking his legs in the air. He’s a very jolly happy baby – simply loves attention and looks at everything that is going on and reaches out for anything he can grab. 4 teeth at [? ?] now coming through. He likes to play with his toys and holds out his hand so that C[atharine] and I can pretend to bite it!

 

April 3^rd

 W can now sit up for short periods unaided.

 

April 21^st

 W at 7 months & is getting much more active though still cannot crawl. Yesterday grabbed some papers of C’s while she was not looking. Makes a varied repertoire of sounds b, d, g etc.

 

May 20^th

 W at 8 months is getting quite a mischievous little boy. He weighs 20lb 6oz. He can move very quickly on the floor by turning over and is always getting out his things. He can pick up small objects delicately between finger & thumb. He makes all sorts of noises & enjoys a game of peep-bo. He cannot yet sit up unaided though he tries. He still has his bottle and shows no sign of being weaned.

 

June 29^th

 W at 9 months + is looking very bonny – rosy & brown, blue eyes, very fair hair with a touch of ginger in it. He now weighs 20lb 7oz but cannot yet manage to crawl through he manages to reach things one would suppose out of reach. For instance he can reach shopping at the bottom of the pram.

 

 He looks at everything very attentively and babbles away in his own language. He has a definite sense of humour & a lovely laugh.

 

 Has just cut 7^th tooth and has given up if unwillingly – his midday bottle. Sucks his thumb a lot.

 

Aug 23^rd

 W weighs 21lbs 13oz. He has been crawling since he was 10 months & is now adept at opening doors & into everything in a flash. Now beginning to try to stand. He seems very bright – likes little games of fitting things with other things. He loved the beach when we were away. Still puts things in his mouth but [?] less than he did. Imitates sounds quite well – says something like ‘William’! Is now on to one bottle a day at rising.

 

Sep 29^th

 W weighs 22lbs 1oz. He is very active & can crawl very fast. Today he first succeeded in pulling himself to his feet in his cot but he has for able to stand with support for some time. He enjoys playing with little cars. He puts them on the seats of chairs and even makes a noise that sounds like car going along.

 

Oct 16^th

 W can now pull himself into standing position quite easily and take a few tentative steps holding on to play pen. Today he managed for the first time to stand one brick on another – beginning of building! He’s mostly cheerful & contented. Has a marvellous appetite. But he also has a furious temper.

 

Nov 7^th – W said ‘bye-bye’ and waved (not [?] at appropriate time). Walks all round the furniture but doesn’t yet stand alone.

 

Dec 4^th

 W still not walking though he gets around very fast by holding on to furniture. Has just started to take an interest in TV & smiles with appreciation when he recognises something. Can build up bricks (or around them!) v. competently.

 

Jan 5^th [1974]

 W can now stand unsupported for a few minutes at a time but still can’t walk. Can say ‘William’ & ‘baby’ but I doubt if he knows what they mean. Likes to build with bricks & push toy cars along but loves to play with my cookery books best of all – piling them up & replacing them in the shelves.

 

Jan 7^th

 W gives up bottle & takes first steps!

 

Jan 22^nd

 W acquires new skills – he has begun to feed himself, can roll a ball to me across the floor and point at pictures.

 

Feb 26^th

 W can now walk quite well though still slowly. He can also climb all the way upstairs & scribble with a pencil. He tries to copy what we say & dislikes being left alone in his cot. Some sleep problems.

 

March 30^th

 W at 18 months. Walks v doggedly – can get to the end of the Lane unaided. Knows about 6 words – no!, dog, egg, ball, nana, yum yum. Can climb stairs. Fetches his cup & bowl when hungry, brings his coat when he wants to go outside & loves to play in the garden & dig the dirt. Has a v strong will of his own.

 

April 7^th

 W’s vocab: no, gone, more, egg, nana, ball, dog, car.

 

April 15^th

 W can now do lovely smacking kisses.

May 31^st

 W now knows about 25 words & will imitate anything I say. He can climb on a chair, walk as far as the Keep, run quite fast. Has just learnt to call me mummy. Still eats with great greed but more discrimination, wanting biscuits rather than bread. Enjoys playing with water, with sand and earth & with cars; does not greatly care for other toys.

 

 List of W’s words: car, biscuit, sweet, ball, mummy, flower, no, teddy, golly, up, more, bye-bye, gone, home, toes, bath, dog, (ba)nana, tea, William, pussy, egg, [Kerry?], honey, door.

 

W at 2 ½ Yrs [1975]

 Appears very bright and observant. Talks fluently – uses short sentences and has a large vocabulary. He obviously enjoys trying to communicate. He is also interested in letters and books. Can sometimes identify the letters A, B & O & recognises the colour orange.

 

 Is very affectionate to me – likes to sit in my lap and suck his thumb saying ‘nice & warm’. He is also generally friendly to others – runs to greet them, shouting ‘hello’. With other children he appears gentle but determined – resists having toys taken away from him. One of the greatest thrills is to go on the train to London & he loves going to Morely College creche. Another treat is painting which he does very seriously.

 

 He can walk quite far – from this house to the village & the heath, but is nervous of stairs and steps. He is still, alas, totally un toilet trained – good results are purely the result of luck. Still has a pretty good appetite.

 

 Is very determined & has a foul temper when thwarted. He is good at building with bricks and at doing simple puzzles. Just recently he has started enjoying imaginative games involving pretend cups of tea, sandwiches, etc.

"Eltham Green still has some way to go before a good reputation is firmly established once and for all."

 

 I came across a 1977 letter from Peter Dawson, Headmaster of Eltham Green Comprehensive School, to the parents of prospective Sixth Form pupils.

 Dawson was a high profile public figure of his day. Celebrated by the Daily Express as "Britain's toughest headmaster", he can be seem as a precursor to the 'superheads' who supposedly turn around failing schools of subsequent generations. He also was a founder and General Secretary of the Professional Association of Teachers. A notoriously strict disciplinarian and strong believer in rules and systems, he was famously the model for Brian Stimpson, the Headmaster played by John Cleese in the Michael Frayn film Clockwise. He even wrote a memoir about his experience at Eltham Green, Making A Comprehensive Work: The Road From Bomb Alley.

 Its a rather forbidding letter:

"ELTHAM GREEN SCHOOL

Headmaster

Peter Dawson BSc (Econ)

 

August 1977

 

Dear Parent,

 This letter is going to the parents of all those who were in the Fifth or Sixth last school year and who might therefore be thinking about joining (or rejoining) the Sixth Form when we reopen on September 5. If your son or daughter has no intention of coming back then there is no need to read any further.

 The first thing I want to say is that there is no point in anyone being in the Sixth Form unless they are really prepared to work. Sixth Form examinations are difficult; GCE Advanced Level work in particular requires great ability and immense effort. It is our experience that some people (although less than used to be the case) come into the Sixth Form too casually. Anyone who does that in September will soon be asked to leave.

 The second thing I want to say has to do with the general appearance of people in the Sixth Form. While school uniform is not required there are a few simple principles which we like observed. Firstly, a few words about the boys. They are expected to wear a collar and tie: T shirts are not acceptable. An ordinary jacket should be worn, which is to say not a leather one or a jerkin. Jeans should not be worn to school, nor any of the current fashions in denim wear. While hair may be worn quite long, there is a limit which is the top of the collar. If it extends beyond that then the young man concerned will be sent for a haircut at once. There are just two things which need to be said about girls entering the Sixth Form. Firstly – as for the boys – jeans and denim wear are not acceptable. Secondly, girls should not come in platform shoes: they are positively dangerous on our staircases.

 Of course, I realise that setting down principles as to what young people should or should not wear or how long they may have their hair raises some hackles. I must be frank and say that I am not at all disturbed by that. I believe that parents in general appreciate the need for moderation in the way young people present themselves at school. Eltham Green still has some way to go before a good reputation is firmly established once and for all. Meanwhile we have to guard carefully the picture we present to those outside the school. For this reason it is my intention to send out of school anyone in the Sixth Form whose appearance falls short of the standard described above.

 The third thing I want to say is that there are some excellent young people who want to follow Sixth Form type courses but who find the regulated life of school more than they can face. I perfectly understand their predicament and have advice to offer: go to college instead. There are many colleges in this area where your son or daughter may study for examinations in the more relaxed and adult atmosphere which it is not possible to provide at school. We will be glad to offer advice about this if you contact the school.

 When you have read this letter, please discuss its contents with your son or daughter. Will you also pass on the enclosed information from the Director of Studies about courses available here next school year. The new term begins on Monday 5 September and those wanting to enter or reenter the Sixth should report to the Main Hall at 11.00 am on that day. You will wish to note that the structure of the school day at Eltham Green is being altered so that morning school next year will normally begin at 8.50 am instead of 9 o’clock. I hope no one will find that prospect so appalling that it prevents them from coming back. The lunch hour next year will be from 1 o’clock until 2 o’clock. There will be no change in our 3.30 pm finishing time.

 During the week before next term begins, Mr J R Parsons, Head of Sixth Form, will be here to offer advice to anyone not sure about coming back to school. He will be in attendance from Wednesday 31 August to Friday 2 September from 9.30 am to 3.30 pm each day. Those who have not been in the Sixth Form before – and their parents – are particularly invited to take advantage of this opportunity for discussion.

Yours sincerely,

Peter Dawson

PS A reminder of something I said in a newsletter to parents at the end of May. Entry to the Sixth should only be considered by those who have a definite mind to study. It should not be regarded as an alternative just because someone cannot find employment."

 My sister did not return to Eltham Green for the Sixth Form.

 

 Eltham Green's two most celebrated seventies pupils were both expelled for hair infringements - Boy George for dying his orange and Glen Tilbrook of Squeeze for growing his too long.

 

The school opened in 1956, closed in 2012 and was demolished in 2015. It has been replaced by an academy.

 

Objet trouve

 

 I was looking in a drawer today and came across a curious neglected thin object. Vacuum wrapped in a tight narrow bag with Japanese writing on it, my initial thought is that it might have been a pair of chopsticks, but it seemed a little outsized. Unsealing this package, I pulled out a fan and spread it open for the first time ever. Made of very high quality card, the fan is pink on one side and blue on the other. Each side has an inscription, in Japanese on the pink and in English - reading "Thank you very much for invitation. March 19 1962. Mayumi Moriyama" - on the blue.

 My father worked as a civil servant at the Department of Employment for decades. His 1962 diary tells us about the event that the invitation was for:

Tuesday 13 March 1962. Met Michael Mellish on the train.

 Charming Japonais I.L.O. [International Labour Organization] fellow (Mayumi Moriyama) lunch at the Bunch of Grapes and up the Dome of St. Paul's.

 Bishop of Woolwich at Lambeth Palace.

Monday 19 March 1962. CISCU meeting.

 Mayumi Moriyama to dinner - flashlight photo with me washing up.

 Like my father, Mayumi Moriyama worked for her Ministry of Labour for thirty years. Unlike my father she then went on to a stellar political career, serving in the Japanese cabinet on three occasions, as Chief Cabinet Secretary, Minister of Education and Minister of Justice. For about fifty years my parents would get a Christmas card from her office, always of a beautifully coloured and printed scene. They were incongruous things to receive, tokens from far away in recognition of a hospitality from many years ago.

 This fan is a very well-made object. Its something of a shame that for sixty-four years it has never been unwrapped and opened up. But if ever there was a fitting time for it to be discovered and used, then that must be today, (almost) the hottest London day ever. Thank you, Minister.